Final Reflection

Final Reflection Post:

1. I have really enjoyed several types of writing posts this semester. One of my favorite lessons we did was the writing on art (through the window, Edward Hopper, artist of our choosing). I enjoyed this because art is so beautiful and writing is also so beautiful so I felt as though we were just adding beauty to beauty and it was very enjoyable. I also really enjoyed the section where we focused on color and was very poetry heavy. I just really felt inspired by the color samples and it was amazing to me how just looking at a color could form a story and a background. I also really enjoyed the share and scare because that is not the type of writing I would normally do so it was fun to sort of break out of my shell and write something new.
2. I personally enjoyed commenting on others work just because it was fun to read and see how some people are so diverse and can really write about anything and write it well. For example every time I got to comment on Charli's work it shocked me how good of a writer she is and how she could write anything very well where it captivated me and made me hang on every word. A specific example is the piece she wrote about the shell this piece was heart wrenching and had a plot twist and was a really great story that stuck with me all semester. I also personally enjoy the writing style of Katheryn because she writes with such depth and it shows through everything she writes. Everyone in this class is incredibly talented and I cannot think of a single person who has not written something I've enjoyed.
3. Setting up my blog was a very exciting experience I loved the idea of having a format to share my work that was completely created by me and could embody everything I want my writing to present. I came up with the name because I've always loved that word and the meaning behind it and I think the word serendipity also shows (for me anyway)  how it should feel to write, to stumble upon something beautiful without searching for it. I know aside from this class my friends have read my blog and I hope they continue to read it, I'm proud of my work and I want anyone to read it that would enjoy it. I know I will continue to use it in the future, this class has sparked a passion for writing I didnt know I had and I have full intentions of continuing to use it. I will write about anything that provokes me to write about it. I have been doing more personal story writing and lately and I would like to post some of those entries to this blog.
4. I love journaling, it is something that feels very personal just because it is the first draft of any story or creation. Stories, poetry, I have anything and everything in my journal. To me journaling is more personal so it is not really something I would like a ton of other people to read. 
5. If I Were in Charge of the World:

If I were in charge of the world I'd cancel flu season, headaches, homework and running late.

If I were in charge of the world there would be later nights, longer weekends and endless sunsets over towns that never sleep.

If I were in charge of the world you wouldn't have sadness, or pain, you wouldn't have a bad report card or "you're just not good enough" you wouldn't even have failure.

If I were in charge of the world a heaping bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream would be a vegetable, All year would be 75 degrees (even when it snows) and a person who forgets to make her bed before school and sometimes forgot to eat a meal would still be in charge of the world.

      6. 

The waves of emotion wash over me, engulfing me like the violent ocean waves during a storm. I toss and I turn dreaming of the simple times. A calming, beautiful, tranquility stained these dreams. I dream of our first date, the first time you told me you loved me,the way you made me feel at peace with a simple glance from across the room. Suddenly the worst feeling overcomes me and I begin to drift away from the tranquil dreaming state and begin to feel like I’m drowning, drifting farther and farther away into a nightmare. I see you walking away, leaving me all alone. I see the person who once held my heart, rip it apart. These dreams are stained with an unsettling, miserable, turbulence. I am jolted awake and look over to the other side of the bed and reach out for my phone longing to call for you to comfort me but you are not there. No matter how much time passes your presence still lingers in my dreams. The once peaceful rainfall that filled my dreams turned into a hurricane because you are gone. The only traces of you are the dream marks on my pillow.

7. I plan to do a lot of creative writing in the future, I love it and even if I can't make a career out of it I still want to do it in my free time. Writing gives me a sense of fulfillment and it makes me genuinely happy and it makes my friends and family happy to read it so all around it is just the thing I do now that brings me the most joy.

8. Thank you all for sharing such amazing work this semester it has been really amazing to learn more about everyone through their writing and you have done such a great job with everything you've posted! Definitely keep writing because everyone in this class has a talent for it, thank you guys for a great year!

9. A screaming comes across the sky. The most violent shades of grey wash over the clouds as they loom closer and solemn raindrops begin to fall. It's the kind of day where you just know something is going to go wrong. I look across the rickety wooden floorboards and see my grandpa, just sitting in his chair, rocking back and forth drifting in and out of sleep just as he does everyday listening to the soft sounds of rain hitting the roof. I study his expression for a while seeing every facial expression he's ever made through the lines and wrinkles on his face. I eventually decide to go over to him, something I hadn't done for years. My grandfather is a strict man, the type of man who would send you to your room without dinner or lock the doors and make you stay outside if you were out ten minutes past curfew. A man that never really understood me or my parents for that matter, and quite frankly did not want to. I was supposed to turn out the way he wanted, I was destined to become a lawyer or doctor or something more than a struggling musician working part time at a record store. I never wanted to be stuck in the boring routine of everyday work but he didn't understand that and decided to not have much to do with me. I always understood or at least told myself that because I know my grandmother passing away was hard on him, so much so that ever since that day he just sits in his rocking-chair and stares out the window. I hesitantly slink over to him, finally ready to talk again, my head full of questions and my heart racing. There are so many things I want to say to him but no words to form the thoughts. I finally am able to squeak out a sentence and I ask him the one thing I want to know. I wanted to know why my future plans had such an effect on him, I wanted to know why he cared so much. The thing that angered me was not the two years of silence but the words that came after. He told me he wanted me to make something of myself and not just sit around unable to fend for myself in the world. He told me he wanted me to live my life while I'm able to live it and not be...well, what I am. This statement was enough to bring a rush of anger over me. I could only think of how hypocritical the simple statement was, he is still able to live his life but chooses not to, because tragedy hit our family he shut out those he has left. He won't go outside of his small four wall world and refuses to move past it. To thank him for the "words of wisdom" he gave me I want to give him the gift he really wants... silence, I came to the conclusion that I need to leave him with few words I hope will make him think. Before I cross the threshold into the dismal unwelcoming world I say to him, in your rocking-chair, by your window dreaming shall you long, alone. In your rocking-chair by your window dreaming, shall you dream such happiness as you may never feel.

Food for Thought

It was a blisteringly hot day during the 4th of July weekend and it had just started to rain. I had been invited to the lake by a group of my best friends and I was incredibly happy to be there...for the most part. By this point we had been just six teenagers stuck in a lake house together for two days in a house together. Don't get me wrong we are best friends but some people in this group have bigger personalities and are more vocal than others which can lead to tension between us. Later in the afternoon things were said and tempers were running high and we had all found ourselves alone in separate rooms accompanied only by our thoughts and the looming threat of things we wished would've gone unsaid. Just as we began to get our attitudes in check we heard a voice call from upstairs signaling that dinner was ready. That is one thing none of us could resist no matter how upset we were we could not pass up a meal (that is one of the many reasons why I love my friends). A meal of grilled chicken and macaroni and cheese was set on the table and we looked at each other with sorry looks on our faces. Just as we sat down something almost magical happened, we started talking, not just talking but enjoying each other's company again and just like that we were brought together. It is amazing what a good meal can do, it can reunite people and stop fights in there tracks. That was a key moment that weekend where we all looked around and could agree we weren't just friends, we were family.

About the Author

About the Author

Taylor Eggert has been an enthusiast of all things miniature and cute from a very young age and has drawn inspiration for this book from that. Taylor lives in Springfield Missouri with her parents and a cute small dog (go figure).

Dan In Real Life

Dan In Real Life

7.) I honestly think that you cannot know for a one-hundred percent fact that you love someone in three days. I think that you have to really know someone, their flaws, their strengths, their good side and bad side before you can fully know if you love them. I believe that you can think you love someone and even come close to love but I just don't think you can know for sure.

14.) I think there are multiple soulmates out there for everyone. I think that there are different kinds of soulmates as well. A soulmate to me is just someone you meet and you automatically feel like old friends or an old married couple, you just feel like your souls or hearts are bonded from the start. I think that you can find friends that are your soulmates and I think you can have romantic soulmates, it just depends on who your heart feels closely tied to.

26.) I think that love is an ability. Before you let yourself feel it it doesn't exist. Love can only be felt by the luckiest of people and until you find the right people to love you can't really feel it. 

28.) Yes I have had a lot of trouble getting over someone in the past. It took me about two months to mostly get over him but with the help of the best friends I could ever ask for I came out on the other side and I've never been happier. It takes a lot longer to get over someone you really love than it took Dan's brother but I also think everyone moves at their own pace when dealing with heart break so that was just apparently all the time he needed.

Child's Play

Child's Play

6.) My favorite cartoon from when I was really young was Blue's Clues and I think my only reasoning for loving that show when I was that little was that I felt like an expert sleuth because I got to "help" Steve find Blue's Clues. I would definitely see it if it was made into a big movie. When I got a little older I found my love of Fairly Odd Parents. I loved this show because it was so funny to me and I genuinely thought that when I turned ten I would get Fairy God parents. This show was made into a movie and it was really terrible but I think if it was done right I would really like to see it.

16.) I very clearly remember my nemesis in pre-school, her name was Gabby and she had the thinnest, most blonde hair I had ever seen. She was the type of girl who would see that you were playing with something and steal it from you if you put it down for two seconds. However the worst thing she did was a very cliche child thing to do, one day when we were listening to a story she grabbed the scissors and choppily cut off about 4 inches of my hair. Needless to say I was not very happy, Gabby has since moved out of Missouri but I obviously have not let it go.

29.) My favorite dinner as a child was spaghetti and meatballs, but the pasta had to be angle hair or I would not eat it and it had to be from a specific brand or I could tell something was off, and again, not eat it.

32. When I grew up I honestly believed that I could be a princess for longer than I'd like to admit. That being said I wanted to be a princess but I wanted to help people so in my childlike mind I created the perfect solution, I could be a princess by day and a doctor by night. That was my dream for at least three years.

37.) My favorite movie as a child was The Last Unicorn. I dont know why I loved that movie so much but I would make my mom take me to the video store once every two weeks to rent that movie. I think I loved that movie so much because everyone my age was watching Disney princess movies and I just wanted to be different which I understand now was a poor choice because I missed out on really good movies because of my desire to be different.

Scare/Share

Don't Go Out On Halloween

I knew I was stupid for being afraid of babysitting on Halloween but with all of the recent news and knowing that a scary holiday calls for stupid teenagers playing pranks and trying to freak people out by any means necessary who could blame me. The thing that scared me most was that I couldn't just look out for myself tonight I was responsible for Sophie, the precious four year old I've been babysitting every week for her whole life. I put my fears aside and grabbed my keys wished my sisters a happy Halloween and began the drive down the long winding road to tonight's adventure. I knew Sophie was sick and really upset about not going trick or treating so I stopped at the grocery store by her house to pick up some candy to hide around the house and let her find. At the checkout line the woman at the register had a stern look rush over her pale face. In all sincerity she tells me to be safe, naturally her words linger with me and I ask her why. She grabs my hand and tells me that the Springdale Mental Hospital had two patients escape due to lack of security and they were reported to be very dangerous and have currently unknown whereabouts. I throw down the little cash I have grab the candy and leave as fast as I can. I sit in the car and think about how horribly cliche this night has become, still I'm not stupid enough to believe that any of what she said was true and I chalked it up to another person trying to play into the holiday and scare me. When I finally arrived I was greeted by a sleeping Sophie on the couch with cartoons blaring from the T.V. I sat down next to her and combed my hand through her fine blonde hair until she woke up. She wore the biggest sleepiest smile when she awoke and wrapped her arms around me, I picked her up and carried her to her room. As I sat her in her bed she looked at me with fear in her eyes and told me to tell the man outside to go away. Knowing it was probably a lingering dream I agreed, tucked her in and turned on the monitor in her room. When I sat down downstairs I heard rustling through the monitor and went upstairs to see if Sophie was okay when I got up there I saw her small tear stained face looking up at me she was scared like I had never seen before. She couldn't say or do anything but point to her 5 foot pile of stuffed animals and chillingly whisper the word "clown." I walked over to the pile and rustled the hair of the toy slow and reassured her " see its just a toy" I said to her tucking her back in and kissing her forehead before I left again. I get the door almost shut right as my phone started ringing. I see that its Sophie's mom and reluctantly answer, running downstairs where I don't disturb Sophie. "Is everything going alright?" She questions, "Yeah she's great, she just got a little freaked out by her clown doll but I think thats..." I don't get to finish my sentence before Sophie's mom cuts me off "What clown doll, Sophie doesn't have a clown doll?'' As soon as she said those words I heard the door to Sophie's room slam shut. I drop my phone and run upstairs pulling the door as hard as I can every move my body makes is pleading with the stuck door to open. Eventually I know Im not getting anywhere by this method and run downstairs to call the police. As I start to run down the stairs I hear the man inside say in a chilling tone "Its okay Sophie I just want to play a game." I go back up and yell with every ounce of pent up rage I have "Don't you dare touch her!" I go downstairs dialing 911 and run outside not knowing what would be waiting for me inside. I back out of the house   not looking away from Sophie's window for a second. I turn for merely a second to see my phone enough to dial. I look up and see a man feet away from me dressed exactly like the man upstairs. I stop dead in my tracks too scared to even breathe. He looked up slowly tilted his head to the side while the eeriest grin came over his face. He slowly lifted his arm pointing to the window. I looked up to see the man in the clown costume upstairs wave and loom over Sophie's bed as the lights cut out and I heard a blood curdling scream.

Reely Good Quotes

Reel Life

Reel Life

1.) It is incredibly hard for me to pick just one favorite movie because I'm never in the mood for the same type of movie all of the time. However some of my favorites include Up, because the beginning hits really hard and then the rest of the movie just means so much more because you feel really connected to the characters throughout the film. I also love Clueless because it is very overly 90's and I love it, it is just one of those movies that always makes me feel better when I'm upset. My last favorite movie is The Imitation Game because it is one of the only historical type of movie that has peaked my interest and I truly loved.
2.) Generally I do not really care for movies with an excess amount of violence or very historical movies. The historical movies are very long winded and my interest does not usually stay with the plot the whole time. There are exceptions to this but for the most part I would not seek out these types of films.
3.) I usually watch movies about once a week and it mostly happens on Saturdays curled up in my bed with the lights off. When this relaxing time comes I watch two movies during the day and one at night.
4.) The survey told me that I was most likely to watch movies for nostalgia and pleasure seeking purposes which I found to be very true because I tend to rematch movies that remind me of a good time in my life or movies that make me feel good at the end and make me have an overall pleased feeling when the movie is over.
5.) If my life was made into a movie I would want it to focus on my relationships with friends and family and just everyday encounters and I would want it to capture my life goals and watching me discover myself and what I truly want in life. I would want to be played by Emma Stone because I love the types of characters she plays and I would love to be played by her.

 

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

I remember the day four years ago that changed so many lives forever. I was in eighth grade and did not have a grasp on what was really important in the world considering the important things to me at that time included what I was going to get for Christmas and what I was going to watch on T.V when I got home.  However this was a changing moment in my life I remember hearing about the Sandy Hook shooting and being completely shocked by it. The events of that tragic day made my mind spiral into a void my thoughts had never wandered in to. As much as this day changed me it wasn't about me. When tragedies like this occur it is human nature to sometimes stretch the events out and make it somehow about us but unless we experienced the worrisome heartache of the families of the victims it simply isn't about us. There were approximately four hundred and fifty-six students enrolled at Sandy Hook Elementary prior to this event and during that day there were four hundred and fifty-six families in gut wrenching agony, not knowing if their child was going to come home that day. Twenty of which were faced with the unthinkable worse pain of knowing their child wouldn't. I cannot imagine that pain and my heart continues to go out to anyone who has ever had to face that pain. You never know when you'll see someone for the last time so I feel like it is very important to make every moment count. This event sparked a fear in me among so many others that this is a real thing that you never think will happen until it happens. People really do have issues and do awful things like this nobody is immune to tragedy as much as we'd love to believe that. When tragedy strikes it makes us all think of the bigger picture and it certainly did that for me. While I was worried about what I was going to get for Christmas or what to watch on T.V so many victims didn't even get to come home to their families. Things like this really make me realize just how lucky I am.

School Photo Hunt

This photo could fall under many categories, this is a teacher who is someone that makes me smile, someone who taught me something and someone I want to be more like. Over the two years I have had Mr. Snyder as my teacher I have learned so much more than just science he taught me to have more confidence and inspired me to be a better person everyday

This is a photo of something that makes me feel nostalgic because it was my first show I was in at Kickapoo and it was such an amazing experience for me and everyone involved absolutely loves that show it is by far my favorite show I've been in.
#HolyGrail

This is a place that will always make me think of Kickapoo no matter how far away I am I will never forget the room with a million names. The stories this area has are countless so many theatre students doing what they love have signed their names before they leave the school.
#PaintOnACanvas

This is a fairly new addition to our lovely school and it is by far one of the things I think a child would find most interesting. I partially think this because I find it very interesting and I'm a senior in high school. That being said I am more like a child than a teenager.
#Chiefs

The closest thing I could get to the outdoors without actually being outside. This is by far the most beautiful view from the school in my opinion. The trees and neatly kept shrubbery make this scene look so peaceful and calming.
#BeautyInTheSmallThings

When asked to take a photo of someone who I want to be more like this is the first person who came to mind. This is one of my best friends Katheryn Twente and everyday I walk into class she is happy and never fails to put me in a good mood no matter how tired I am or how much I'm overreacting about relationship or friendship drama. Throughout the year so far I haven't had a truly bad day and I owe it to the fact that she makes my day start out with a smile. Her endless passion for the things she does is truly inspiring and she is one of the kindest sweetest people I have ever met. I am so lucky to have met her in eighth grade over a failed science project.
#FailedCrystalExperiment

This is a photo of a view that was interesting to me. I have been a part of Kickapoo theatre ever since my freshman year and I have been used to performing in the auditorium. This year as we all know we got the privilege of receiving a brand new performing arts center and it is truly amazing. Usually when I look out from the stage I see a large crowd of people running around during rehearsal but this time the PAC was completely empty and it was calming to me.
#CalmBeforeTheStorm

This is a photo of something hand"written" This is the door to our choir director's office and as seniors graduate they carve their names into Corn's door. I think this is important because it is a really meaningful way for him to remember his students as they leave his choir.
#blankspace

Flea Market Photo

There were many reasons she wore a frown, sometimes she missed the simple life she had before she got married she missed Ohio she missed her family and friends and all of the things she dropped to move to Buffalo and start a family. She didn't resent them at all she loved her husband and children or at least that's what she told herself. She feared that she was a bad mother because she knew her thoughtful mind was constantly whisked away to the easy life she had before. Not only that but she knew her husband was falling out of love with her quicker and quicker each day. They were high school sweethearts that had been best friends from a very young age she was always the one that was more in love than him. She never wanted to be in this place, a mother of three children and a husband who she could lose at any moment to the office secretary or the pretty blonde woman two doors down. She never spoke of these fears, she just wrote in her journal until her hands were writhing in pain and continued with her day as if nothing was wrong. She greeted her husband after work with a meal and a kiss on the cheek and bringing the kids in from their nap to greet him too. From just looking at her you'd never guess that she had a war on her mind but she did...and she was losing.

Inspired by Artist Profile

The night brings many things, sometimes eventful, sometimes nothing more than a memory that fades in the passing days. To my surprise Winter was a hard season for a diner but I stayed open and I dedicated my life to it, but no one ever came in. Not until one barren Wednesday night, despite my better judgment I stayed open and much to my surprise a couple walked in followed by a man in a suit and hat. You forget how it can feel to be surrounded by a swirling pool of new people, new experiences, new feelings, until it happens. I studied the trio, each of them remaining silent as not to disturb the other two. The woman wore a red dress and had long red hair that almost ran down her back like the line of fire when you strike a match, and the two men had on tailored suits and brought an almost too lingering cologne smell. The three didn't know each other, or at least it appeared that way, the deafening silence almost rang too loud for the four walls we were held captive by. Eventually the man with his girlfriend, or fiancee or whoever she was attached to him spoke, his rich tone rang through the restaurant, he started asking about the diner, which intrigued the others to join in before long we had an unspoken bond that can only be shared by people in this space at this time of night. We laughed and joked until morning and it made me realize maybe tonight was just a passing memory but for the amount of time we were together it felt like the most eventful thing happening in the world, it's amazing how the night changes not only people but the memories we share.

Famous Artist

Edward Hopper

Edward Hopper was a famous artist born on July 22, 1882 in Nyack, New York. Hopper was the son of Garret and Elizabeth Hopper who were proud dry- goods merchants and only had one sibling, his sister Marion Hopper. Throughout Hopper's life he and is sister attended a mixture of private and public schools until college where he attended New York School of Art and Design. During the stride and increasing popularity of Edward Hopper's work many major historical events were taking place such as the end of the war, the death of Warren Harding, Herbert Hoover taking office,the creation of Mickey Mouse through Steamboat Mickey and the stock market crash. Despite the ever changing world around him Hopper faced many hardships throughout his own life, including the struggle he faced to define his own style, the death of his father, having to solicit to get work by going door to door and begging, and lastly, the depression that came from having to do that. Hopper even openly admitted that he hated illustration. His sad days soon ended when he saw the light at the end of the tunnel that was the woman he met that soon became his wife, Josephine Hopper. With things beginning to look up Hopper began to work mainly in oil paintings, watercolor and etchings and is considered to be a realism and impressionism artist. Edward Hopper's most famous works are Nighthawks, Automat, and New York Movie. Hopper unfortunately passed away on May 15, 1967 in Manhattan, New York with his wife passing away only ten months after he did. They left their collection of almost one thousand art pieces to the Whitney Museum of American Art.

Class Comments

Anastasiya: 

Famous First Line: Hey Anastasiya! I think this piece is funny and really light-hearted and I love that. I feel like many people share this view point and the way you went about it was easy to read. Great Job!

Famous Last Line: Anastasiya this is such a cute story. I love that you made the story sort of revolve around the two being misunderstood and judged but still made the ending positive. Great job reinventing the last line and great job in general!

Dream Marks on My Pillow: This is such an amazing piece! I really relate to this and I know long distance is not easy. I love the way you connected talking to him being like a sleeping pill. I love this!

6 Word Memoir: I love this Anastasiya! You've taken such a simple phrase and made it have so much meaning behind it.

Black out: There is such a sense of pain behind this black out. I love your writing style you really are able to make a strong point out of very few words.

Nichole:

6 Word Memoir: Hey Nichole! These are all deep phrases and I love the way you got such a sense of passion across in just six words! Amazing Job! I also love the one about music that is such a true thing and I love the way you wrote it.

If I Were in Charge of the World: I love the line about forgetting to fix your hair I completely understand that! I love what you said in the first passage too. Those are all things that shouldn't exist and I love that you added that serious note. Great job!

Pillow Talk: 

Thank you so much for sharing this Nichole. You captured such an intense sense of emotion through this and I'm so glad you shared this because it takes a lot of courage to do. Great job!

Fly Away From: This is such a strong piece! I love your word choice and I love how you can really tell the emotion behind it. You really captured the way a lot of us feel and this is just such a good piece. 

Memorable Passage: I really like the reasoning you have behind your feelings towards this passage.This is a great passage thank you so much for sharing!

6 Word Memoirs

• The privilege of falling in love
• When has complaining solved any problem
• Serenaded by nature's sweet soothing lullaby
• Adventures make close friends become family
• Pining for love I never got
• You're my daily dose of sunshine
• Trapped by expectations freed by reality

That’s All Folks

It all started with a nervous bride and a stormy day. As I saw my best friend standing in front of the mirror I could tell something was wrong but I didn’t think much of it because it is not unnatural to be nervous on your wedding day. Nothing even seemed wrong until the moment she put on the dress, the most beautiful, simple dress I had ever laid my eyes on. As I looked at the girl I’ve known since we were small I suddenly am overcome with the vision of us dressing up in our mother’s wedding dresses and pretending we were getting married, this day seemed ages away from then but in the blink of an eye this became so real. I studied her features and began to tell she had a war on her mind something was very wrong and I knew she wouldn’t tell me. She was good in that way, she never wanted me to worry she brought a tranquility with her everywhere she went, until today. She began pacing back and forth, tears swelling in her eyes and her heart overcome with emotion. I didn’t know what to do, should I calm her down or let her panic and free herself of worry? She began exclaming to me without so much as a breath between words. She talked about how she didn’t know if she was ready, how she thought she only said yes to him to get her mother off her back, most importantly how she didn’t even know if she loved him. Every word she said broke my heart more and more I wanted her to be happy more than anything so I comforted her and went to get her favorite thing in the world, french fries from the greasiest restaurant I’ve ever stepped into, I hated it but ever since we were young she’s loved it, so I left, wanting nothing more than to rid her of this indecision and worry. As I came back I noticed the open window and knew that my best friend had done the most painfully cliche thing she could’ve in that moment she left a note explaining herself and fled the chapel. My best friend is a runaway bride. Considering my status as the maid of honor I realized that this was partially my fault and I was going to have to break the news to her not-so husband to be and the rest of the guests. I had no idea what to say and the only image that came to my mind was the ending of looney toons where that plump cartoon pig would stutter out the phrase “that’s all folks”. I knew however that that would not be the most comforting thing to say in this moment so I wracked my brain for the words to use to let everyone know there was no longer going to be a wedding. I gathered myself, opened the chapel door and knew what I was about to say would change so many lives forever.

Comfortless Confrontation

(Famous First and Last Lines In My Own Words)

A screaming comes across the sky. The most violent shades of grey wash over the clouds as they loom closer and solemn raindrops begin to fall. It's the kind of day where you just know something is going to go wrong. I look across the rickety wooden floorboards and see my grandpa, just sitting in his chair, rocking back and forth drifting in and out of sleep just as he does everyday listening to the soft sounds of rain hitting the roof. I study his expression for a while seeing every facial expression he's ever made through the lines and wrinkles on his face. I eventually decide to go over to him, something I hadn't done for years. My grandfather is a strict man, the type of man who would send you to your room without dinner or lock the doors and make you stay outside if you were out ten minutes past curfew. A man that never really understood me or my parents for that matter, and quite frankly did not want to. I was supposed to turn out the way he wanted, I was destined to become a lawyer or doctor or something more than a struggling musician working part time at a record store. I never wanted to be stuck in the boring routine of everyday work but he didn't understand that and decided to not have much to do with me. I always understood or at least told myself that because I know my grandmother passing away was hard on him, so much so that ever since that day he just sits in his rocking-chair and stares out the window. I hesitantly slink over to him, finally ready to talk again, my head full of questions and my heart racing. There are so many things I want to say to him but no words to form the thoughts. I finally am able to squeak out a sentence and I ask him the one thing I want to know. I wanted to know why my future plans had such an effect on him, I wanted to know why he cared so much. The thing that angered me was not the two years of silence but the words that came after. He told me he wanted me to make something of myself and not just sit around unable to fend for myself in the world. He told me he wanted me to live my life while I'm able to live it and not be...well, what I am. This statement was enough to bring a rush of anger over me. I could only think of how hypocritical the simple statement was, he is still able to live his life but chooses not to, because tragedy hit our family he shut out those he has left. He won't go outside of his small four wall world and refuses to move past it. To thank him for the "words of wisdom" he gave me I want to give him the gift he really wants... silence, I came to the conclusion that I need to leave him with few words I hope will make him think. Before I cross the threshold into the dismal unwelcoming world I say to him, in your rocking-chair, by your window dreaming shall you long, alone. In your rocking-chair by your window dreaming, shall you dream such happiness as you may never feel.

                                       

A Memorable Passage...

"Sometimes I can feel my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living" -Johnathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.

This passage caught my attention because the meaning I see behind it is such a true thing I usually do not think about. In my mind this stands out because there are so many things I could be doing but I sometimes become stuck in a rut and live the same monotonous life everyday. It almost feels as though there are so many things I could be doing at any given moment but never get to do them. This is why the passage is memorable to me, it reminds me that there are so many endless possibilities inside me if I just go out and live them.

Dont Quote Me On That...

"We are all dreamers, wanting to be completely out of touch with reality." -Anonymous 

"The most memorable people in your life that love you when you aren't very lovable." -Anonymous

"She lives the poetry she cannot write." -Oscar Wilde